Anonymous. Dir. Edward D. Wood, Jr. Perf. David Hasselhoff, Sarah Jessica Parker, Mark Wahlberg, Lindsay Lohan, and Willem Dafoe. Columbia Pictures. 30 September 2011.
Thanks to the kind auspices of Simon and Schuster, I have two copies of James Shapiro's magisterial Contested Will: Who Wrote Shakespeare?—which I've mentioned before on this blog—to give away, and I thought the Shakespeare-reading community, in light of the recent release of Anonymous, would appreciate a creative outlet for their thoughts on the authorship issue. Bardfilm provides.
This is your chance to compose a haiku on the subject! Please submit your English-Language Haiku on any aspect of the authorship issue in the comments below. When we have selected the winners, we will post their names and invite them to e-mail their addresses directly to us to claim their prizes.
Here, then, are the details of the competition:
Here, then, are the details of the competition:
- For the purposes of this competition, an English-language Haiku is defined as a poem consisting of three lines, the first and last of which have five syllables and the middle of which has seven syllables. We recognize that other forms are viable poetic expressions—but not for this competition. The judges will be strict on this point, so make sure your haiku follows the 5-7-5 syllable rule. For a sample, see my award-winning Shakespeare haiku.
- Haiku must be posted before 11:59 p.m. Central Time on Thursday, November 3, 2011 in order to be eligible for the competition.
- Submitted Haiku must be the original work of the submitter (we'll be checking).
- One haiku per person, please!
- There will be three judges to this competition: The author of Bardfilm, the author of Shakespeare Geek, and blogger and Twitterer PlaysTheTart.
- The decisions of the judges are final.
- We reserve the right to add to this list of rules.
With that, you may commence posting!Stratfordian's Lament"Who wrote Shakespeare's plays?"—
A hopeless tautology?
Not to Ed De Vere.
Note: The winners have been announced!
For more Shakespearean haiku, see The Complete Works of William Shakespeare in Haiku.
Click below to purchase the book from amazon.com
(and to support Bardfilm as you do so).
(and to support Bardfilm as you do so).
24 comments:
more a limerick:
There once was a man called de vere/
who they claim is the true will shakespeare/I say did he ever write a true tale d'hiver?/O that silly young man called de vere.
"Edward de Vere, Dead in 1604, Continues Writing Shakespeare's Plays"
If de Vere wrote "Lear"/
He had to be a zombie--/
Title is not "Brains"!
Epic scholar fail:
de Vere is no great writer
And Emmerich is a fool.
I can tell already that the competition is going to be stiff!
Thanks!
kj
Here's another of mine (don't worry—I'm not included in the list of possible winners):
Oxford wrote the plays.
But he had to hire some help:
Infinite monkeys.
Thanks!
kj
Heed not the doubters
Mediocrity will die
But the Bard lives on.
Bacon once told me
He wrote all of Shakespeare's plays.
Ne'er heed talking food.
Are titles fair game? If so, ignore the silly title. *ahem*
"Ah --- Speak, Seer!"
Name him, whose pen pulled
bluebottles from blank pages ---
spontaneous life!
Who would have thought it?
The world’s greatest lit. arrives
anonymously.
The Earl of Oxford,
The educated scholar,
Can't steal the glory.
Who builds pyramids?
Aliens! Who wrote Will's works then?
An Earl, don't you know?!
A question for the debaters:
Would YOU secretly
Name your masterwork after
Someone else's son?
So how did Will write?
Iambic pentameter.
No help from the Earl.
Want real fantasy
Told with skill? Screw Emmerich.
Go read "The Tempest."
O Edward deVere
Seventeenth Earl of Oxford
Turning in his grave.
Thanks to all submitters! Here's a last one from me. It intimates that I think titles are all right--even though this one has more syllables than the poem.
I Coulda Been a Pretendah; or, Ockham's Razor Cuts Both Ways
Bacon or Marlowe?
Elizabeth? Oxford?
No. William Shakespeare.
Take care!
kj
Um, isn't that second line one syllable short? Here's a fix: "Elizabeth? Oxford? (hiss)"
Very good! You pass the test . . . yes, the test that I set up to see if you were observing the rules!
Thanks! I'll just shove another "or" in there (instead of insisting that Ell-iss-a-beh-eth is five syllables).
I Coulda Been a Pretendah; or, Ockham's Razor Cuts Both Ways
Bacon or Marlowe?
Elizabeth or Oxford?
No. William Shakespeare.
Thanks for the correction!
kj
The Problem With Reading Plays Autobiographically:
Come on guys, it's clear,
In retrospect, obvious,
Hamlet wrote Shakespeare.
Emmerich: "Where there's
a Will, there's de Vere!" I plead:
"Let sleeping bards lie."
You think me simple,
Ill at ease with quill in hand,
Poor bare forked muse?
As his honest Puck,
those nightly dreams all jewels,
Shakespeare was no fool.
The competition is closed, and the judges are meeting in a conspiratorial manner to determine the winners.
kj
The winners have been announced!
http://bardfilm.blogspot.com/2011/11/haiku-competition-winners.html
Thanks!
kj
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