Cate Blanchett's Disappointing Elizabeth I

Elizabeth: The Golden Age. Dir. Shekhar Kapur. Perf. Cate Blanchett and Geoffrey Rush. 2007. DVD. Universal Studios, 2008.

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Elizabeth: The Golden Age answers the golden, age-old question of what would happen if you took a thrilling narrative, an immense budget, a number of top-notch actors and actresses, a lush soundtrack, and beautiful cinematography and tried to make it as bone-wearyingly boring as you possibly can.

We at Bardfilm try to be as positive as possible in our reviews. But this film is unforgivably dull.

That's particularly the case because it has so much working in its favor! How can the threat of the Spanish Armada possibly be made tedious? The history on which this is based is unbelievably interesting, but this film is dry as dust. And please note that I don't demand absolute historical accuracy in dramatic retellings of historical events—if I did, I wouldn't be able to enjoy any one of Shakespeare's ten history plays. But this film takes the exciting, non-stop drama of this part of Elizabeth's reign and slogs though it at a sloth's pace. It's ridiculously uninspiring.

The clip below shows one way they take the excitement of actual history and empty it of anything even mildly interesting. They take Elizabeth the First's great speech at Tilbury—it's the monarchical equivalent of Shakespeare's Henry V's speech before Agincourt—and re-write it so that it has none of the fire and splendor of the original:

What a mess. The soldiers aren't cheering at what she says; they're simply cheering because they think that she's done talking absolute drivel. Here's what Elizabeth the First actually said, on August 8, 1588, to the troops at Tilbury as they gathered to face the overwhelming force of the invading Spanish fleet:

My loving people . . . I am come amongst you, as you see, at this time, not for my recreation and disport, but being resolved in the midst and heat of the battle, to live or die amongst you all, to lay down for my God and for my kingdom, and for my people, my honour, and my blood, even in the dust. I know I have the body but of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and of a King of England, too. (Somerset 464)

For dramatic effect, that has been pared down slightly from the complete speech (which I print in full below)—and I have no doubt that, had Cate Blanchett been allowed to deliver those lines instead of the mindless schlock they gave her to say, the film would have benefited immeasurably.

Let Blanchett speak these lines—or just give her the St. Crispian's Day speech! Either would be inexpressibly superior to the lines they actually gave her.

Here, to provide the complete historical record, is the speech in its entirety:

My loving people. We have been persuaded by some that are careful of our safety, to take heed how we commit ourself to armed multitudes for fear of treachery; but I assure you, I do not desire to live to distrust my faithful and loving people. Let tyrants fear. I have always so behaved my self, that under God, I have placed my chiefest strength and safeguard in the loyal hearts and goodwill of all my subjects, and therefore I am come amongst you, as you see, at this time, not for my recreation and disport, but being resolved in the midst and heat of the battle, to live or die amongst you all, to lay down for my God and for my kingdom, and for my people, my honour, and my blood, even in the dust. I know I have the body but of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and of a King of England, too, and think foul scorn that Parma or Spain, or any Prince of Europe should dare to invade the borders of my realm; to which, rather than any dishonour shall grow by me, I myself will take up arms, I myself will be your general, judge and rewarder of every one of your virtues in the field. I know already for your forwardness, you have deserved rewards and crowns; and we do assure you, in the word of a Prince, they shall be duly paid you. (Somerset 464)

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Works Cited

Somerset, Anne. Elizabeth I. New York: St. Martin’s Press, 1991.

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Links: The Film at IMDB.

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The Private Lives of Elizabeth and Essex—and of Shakespeare

The Private Lives of Elizabeth and Essex. Dir. Michael Curtiz. Perf. Bette Davis, Errol Flynn, Vincent Price, Donald Crisp, Alan Hale, and Olivia de Havilland. 1939. DVD. Warner Home Video, 2005.

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I watched this film some time ago, more as a curiosity about how the times of Shakespeare were portrayed in film in the 1930s than anything else. I found it to be wonderful and terrible in equal measure. I chose the three clips below to illustrate that.

Bette Davis plays Queen Elizabeth with power and grandeur. But the Elizabeth she is asked to portray—at least in the romantic, behind-the-scenes scenes with Essex—is sappily and ridiculously (not to mention unhistorically) romantic. Errol Flynn is good as Essex—he's lovely at flying into rages. But the romantic side of him is sentimental rather than swashbuckling.

The Queen's entrance is nicely done: though it's not meticulous about period furnishings, costumes, or attitudes, it provides a sense of grandeur to the royal personage.

The film also provides an interesting twist on the story of Queen Elizabeth's reaction to a performance of Richard II. In 1601, Shakespeare's company was paid to put on a production of Richard II the day before a failed insurrection. The play addresses the successful deposition of an unpopular monarch, and the theory is that the leaders of the insurrection (the Earl of Essex and his crowd) thought that the play would rally the people to their cause—or, at least, give them courage to go through with a dangerous and deadly—and, for Essex and many others, fatal—operation. Afterwards, in extreme pique, Her Majesty purportedly said, "I am Richard—know ye not that?"

In this clip. Her Majesty is much more laid-back about the situation, chiding Lord Burghley, one of her advisors, for censoring "Master Shakespeare and his players without consulting me."

Finally, yes, that is Vincent Price, lurking in the background, playing Sir Walter Raleigh, looking guilty at having intercepted the letters Elizabeth and Essex wrote each other during Essex's Irish campaign. I knew you'd recognize him!

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Links: The Film at IMDB.

Click below to purchase the film from amazon.com
(and to support Bardfilm as you do so).

Inspector Lewis and The Merchant of Venice

“Quality of Mercy.” By Alan Plater. Perf. Kevin Whately, Jo Herbert, Bryan Dick, and Ronan Vibert. Dir. Bille Eltringham. Inspector Lewis. Season 3, episode 2 [also listed as Season 2, episode 6]. BBC. 29 March 2009. DVD. PBS, 2010.

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Mysteries invoking Shakespeare are often difficult to write about. Being analytical without giving spoilers is difficult.

Bardfilm circumvents that difficulty by, in this instance at least, being merely informative! An episode of Inspector Lewis is set among a small theatre troupe putting on The Merchant of Venice. Would anyone care to speculate on the murder weapon? In any case, the episode itself is well done (although the themes of the Shakespeare play aren't integrated into the show itself to any great degree). Here's the opening sequence, which shows the director being perhaps a bit too harsh on the actors. Enjoy!

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Links: The Episode at IMDB.

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Romeo and Juliet: The Rock Opera

Rockin' Romeo and Juliet. Dir. David McGaw. Oto Brezina, Stephen Burr, and Tristan Creeley. 2006. Chockablock Productions, 2006.

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A theme of obscure and odd Romeo and Juliet-related material seems to be inadvertently developing. To follow that trend a bit further, I'll draw our collective attention to the trailer for a weird (not "Wëird Sisters" weird—just weird weird) film titled Rockin' Romeo and Juliet.

In it, the rock bank OGGI (or a rock band played by OGGI—it's not made clear) is "Transported through time to rock with Shakespeare."

It looks pretty bad, and the announcer on the trailer below sounds like he's embarrassed by what he's saying—he really doesn't sell the film at all!

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Links: The Film at IMDB.

A Return to the Romeo and Juliet Monkeys

Romeo and Juliet: A Monkey’s Tale. Dir. Karina Holden. Perf. Tim Hopper and Thousands of Monkeys. 2007. DVD. Animal Planet, 2008.

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When I first wrote on this film, I was a bit dismissive (for which, q.v.). I'm still pretty dismissive, but now I have a video clip to back up my dismissiveness!

Actually, the film isn't bad. It's an intriguing way of telling us about these amazing monkeys—it draws in the double audience of naturalists and Shakespeareans, and, I suppose, Shakespearean naturalists—though that sounds a bit like a nudist colony headed by King Lear ("Come, unbutton here . . .").

The clip below will give you a sense of what happens when you take the gnomes, the seals, the sparrows and pigeons, and all the other animated entities out of Romeo and Juliet. What remains is the basic story—with monkeys!

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Links: The Film at IMDB.

Click below to purchase the film from amazon.com
(and to support Bardfilm as you do so).

A Few Thoughts on Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Undead

Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Undead. Dir. Jordan Galland. Perf. Jake Hoffman and Devon Aoki. 2009. DVD. C Plus Pictures / Indican, 2010.

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My hopes were high for this film. When I first learned about it—back in 2008, no less (for which, q.v.)—I was skeptical, but, as the release date was pushed back and pushed back, I became more and more entranced.

Perhaps because my hopes were so high, watching the film itself was a little bit of a letdown. It's wasn't a big bit of a letdown—just a little bit of one.

The film is bizarre and certainly worth seeing, but I wish its engagement with the text of Hamlet and Tom Stoppard's play was deeper. Still, there are some wonderful things about it.

The story it tells is one of an out-of-work director who is hired to direct a strange derivative version of Hamlet—one with vampires and other oddities. Some of the cast members are also vampires, including something of an evil-twin version of Horatio. Oh, and they're all searching for the Holy Grail. One of the best parts involves the summoning, during opening night, of the actual Hamlet on whom all the stories (Shakespeare's included) have been based—and he's a complete, unloveable ham. The characters playing Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are also wonderfully realized, as you can see in the clip below (which also includes a few other bits and pieces to give you a feel for the entire film):

Clearly, you should all see this film—even if it doesn't provide much fodder for a Shakespeare and Film class or a scholarly essay, it will entertain.

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Links: The Film at IMDB.

Click below to purchase the film from amazon.com
(and to support Bardfilm as you do so).